The many shades of anger

As a young woman, I had trouble controlling my anger. It was an old anger, red-hot and smoldering. But I wasn’t aware of its presence, and it would flare up unexpectedly. Especially when I felt I was not seen or not heard or when my personal integrity was threatened. In…

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Significantly alone

The elderly widower knocked on my kitchen door and then, in the way of neighbors in this rural community, started to let himself in. I forestalled him, not in the mood for visitors, and he produced a card with a photo of his recently deceased wife and handed it to…

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Listening carefully

crescent moon

One of my favorite David Whyte poems begins like this: “Sometimes if you move carefully through the forest breathing like the ones in the old stories who could cross a shimmering bed of leaves without a sound, […]” I find this quality of being quietly present in the world very…

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Worry

My cat is a real night-huntress. And sometimes, when I get up in the morning, I don’t find her in her customary position: curled up, sleeping soundly on her blanket. Immediately, irrational fears pop into my head. Where is she? Did something happen? Usually, she comes running into the house…

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Silence

One of the challenges, during my counselor training, was to allow moments of silence during a session with a client. It felt uncomfortable to hold back – not to immediately jump into the gap. Once I had learned to let go of this feeling of unease and not to fill…

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Zwijgen

Een van de uitdagingen, tijdens mijn training als counselor, was om te leren stiltes in een gesprek te laten vallen. Het was onwennig – ik moest de neiging onderdrukken om meteen in de bres te springen. Toen ik geleerd had om het ongemakkelijk gevoel los te laten en niet te…

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Distraction

I should have posted a blog a week and a half ago (yes, I did promise a weekly blog!). But there was so much distraction: my house was undergoing renovations, I went on a trip… things kept coming up. Finally I resigned myself to the fact that taking care of…

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Afgeleid

Ik had al anderhalve week geleden een blog moeten posten (ja, ik beloofde echt een wekelijkse blog!). Er was echter teveel afleiding: bij mij thuis wordt verbouwd, ik ging een week op reis… telkens kwam er weer iets tussen. Uiteindelijk legde ik me erbij neer dat voor mezelf zorgen tijdelijk…

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Body language

One of the participants at a workshop I held arrived that day on crutches. She had sprained her ankle and it was still very sore. But she was sure she would be able to do the workshop. I was planning to do several exercises using movement so I asked her…

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Lichaamstaal

Een deelnemer aan één van mijn workshops kwam de bewuste dag aan op krukken. Ze had haar enkel verzwikt en het was nog kwetsbaar. Maar ze dacht dat ze in principe aan alles mee zou kunnen doen. Ik was van plan om verschillende bewegingsoefeningen te gebruiken dus ik vroeg haar…

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